Erin's Journals

Just a thought… Once you overcome the one-inch tall barrier of subtitles, you will be introduced to so many more amazing films. [Bong Joon-ho]

Well, the Oscars 2020 are history and just a few notes: seeing Bong Joon-ho win for Best Director was everything. And then to take BEST PICTURE? How glad I was to be wrong about that prediction in last Thursday’s journal! It‘s the first non-English-speaking film to win that honour and I’m telling you that if you’re the least bit curious, don’t be put off by subtitles!

It’s a film like none you’ve ever seen. A twisty-turny-hold-onto-your-seat movie event and as I’ve said before, it’s kept us thinking long after Molly has cleaned up the popcorn bits that fell into my bra and onto the closet floor.

All in all, I thought the Oscars 2020 show was fantastic. Of course, I’m in the Pacific time zone, where bedtime is much less of a factor. But anyway, have another sip of coffee or tea and read on.

There were fewer tributes to the “magic” of movies than usual; less of the past and more efforts to pull the show and the Academy into the present. Eminem? Okay…it struck me as unusual, having him perform at the Oscars, until I remembered that “Lose Yourself” was the first rap song to take home a Best Original Song statuette. 

Billie Eilish delivered “Yesterday” beautifully for the In Memoriam section (which I thought sped through photos too quickly). She’s a wickedly talented young woman and it was great to see her and her brother gain an even wider audience last night; two weeks ago she won five Grammys, so she’s no stranger to lovers of pop music, but it never hurts to stretch her potential audience a bit.

Tonight I’m introducing all three sisters to Jojo Rabbit, having seen Judy on the weekend with Cindy, #2 of 4, who arrived Friday. Having the four sisters together this week is kind of a big deal; we haven’t ever been on a mini vacay together, so we’ve rent a larger car (ours sits two comfortably, three if the person in the back seat folds up quietly like a garment bag) and have a few small adventures planned.

And I do mean small. For Heather (#1) and Leslie (#4), a road trip to LA is their idea of a good time: go and stand in line and attend a Dr. Phil taping or a game show, which is something they did years ago. Me? I’d rather shave my head with a cheese grater and sit within spitting distance of Trump at a makeup table. So, yeah – since only Rob and I are are licensed on the cars in our garage, we’ll be staying put.

I haven’t asked if a jigsaw puzzle is their idea of a good time, but I’m going to lay it out there (literally). I ordered and received this last week.

I got this idea when I was in recovery last summer. In the sitting room, there was a table with about a thousand puzzle pieces placed upon it. One young woman would work on it quietly and laboriously, and on the night before she was to go home, we all joined her to finish it. (Appropriately enough for our surroundings and those of us in it, there were pieces missing.)

Doing a puzzle is not just old-fashioned, it can be a great diversion from other distractions, like the TV and other devices that take us away from the company around us. It builds a spirit of cooperation and teamwork.

What does that have to do with four sisters? I think it could prove a lovely way to get us just to sit and talk. No alcohol needed to lubricate an honest chat. To have deeper conversations than we might over dinner or sitting by a pool.

Of course, that’s just one idea and, honestly, I’m not sure who will be into it, if anyone. Tomorrow, I have a surprise planned for the ladies that includes a phone call and group session with a friend of mine who’s a medium. I’ve talked with Cyndi about a half-dozen or so times in the past and recorded, then transcribed our conversations. She’s very good at plucking names and messages from wherever she goes and since tomorrow marks the birthday of Leslie’s late son Michael, it just seems fitting.

Well, friend, that’s it from here today. Have yourself a great week and I’ll be back with you on Thursday. Feel free to add any of your favourite moments from last night on my Facebook page and thanks for coming by!

Just a thought… As artists we do the work that we do. Receiving an award or not receiving an award in no way diminishes one’s talent or value. [Phylicia Rashad]

Yes, that’s all true, but thank you so much for your kind words regarding the Canadian Broadcasting Hall of Fame induction coming in May. It’s been a really wonderful week from that standpoint and I owe you so much.

Back to reality! Today’s a full-on cleaning day as my sister Cindy (#2 of 4; I’m #3) arrives tomorrow for five days; sisters Heather and Leslie arrive Monday to make it a four-of-a-kind. Lots of great family time ahead for the Davis sisters in a rare reunion – just missing Dad, who’s home in Kelowna. But there’s a Facetime plan in the works….

From the small screen to the big one – the Oscars are this Sunday night, and I wouldn’t miss ’em for the world. I usually try to see as many of the contenders as I can and a few of this year’s offerings certainly stand out above the others to this paying customer.

Marriage Story, tender and heartbreaking, delivered a master class in acting from Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson and both performances are surely trophy-worthy. But it is co-star Laura Dern who is the cast member expected to take the stage this Sunday to accept her award.

1917 has been widely lauded, but it left me wishing there was more of a story. Many won’t agree with me, but that’s just how it felt. Perhaps because I was watching too closely the whole “one shot” marvelry of the film’s cinematographer (a shoo-in for the coveted trophy), and I’ll try to see it again with a little less concentration on that incredible feature of the movie.

As for films that left me thinking of them for days – something that I think makes for an exceptional experience in a book, an article, a film or a conversation – I have three for you.

First, Jojo Rabbit. I wrote a journal here about it when we first saw this film about a boy who’s a member of the Hitler youth (whose imaginary friend is Adolf himself) and whose eyes are opened to the reality of the world around him as the film unfolds. 

It’s a bit of movie magic; don’t be thrown off by the quirky précis of the film. I’ll watch this again when my sisters are all here together. LOVED Jojo (for which Ms Johansson also has been getting nominations).

Second, Once Upon a Time…In Hollywood. I generally avoid gratuitous violence in films (a Quentin Tarantino given), but this one’s cast and story had me hooked: an aging, frustrated actor (Leonardo DiCaprio) and his stunt man buddy (Brad Pitt) live in the same Hollywood Hills neighbourhood as actress Sharon Tate and her husband, at the time of the fateful rise of the Manson family.

While I had expected a much different story, this one twists truth and adds an unforgettable final act that made me want to go back and watch Brad Pitt’s mastery one more time. (Superficial Comment Alert!) Do not miss Mr. Pitt on top of a roof without a t-shirt. I’ve never been gaga over him, but this 56-year-0ld man is truly a beauty to behold. And, yes, he’s a fine actor as well – obviously.

And third: if you follow films at all, you know that the Korean film maker Bong Joon-ho has been getting raves for Parasite. And no wonder. It’s two movies in one, starting with a light-hearted con caper; for me to give you any more details would be completely wrong.

We went in blind – knowing only to sit back far enough to enjoy the full screen and its subtitles – and found the story and its execution to be breathtaking. I can only compare it to the works of Jordan Peele (Get Out and Us) and although Rob and I were talking about it the whole way home and he wondered if he “got” it and all of the critical acclaim, I was buzzing for hours.

Honestly, it’s like nothing you’ve ever seen. And really, after a century of films, isn’t that an incredible accomplishment? On that note, I found The Irishman to be notable for its performances and technical trickery of de-aging its stars, but really just “more of the same” when it comes to mob movies, a genre in which I’m certainly no expert (that whole violence thing again). Contrast that with my big sister, who has watched it three times!

So, a few predictions: 1917 is likely to take the Best Picture Award this Sunday at the Oscars because of its artistic mastery, and because many voting Academy members admit to not bothering to watch movies with subtitles. That’s a real shame and a lazy shortcoming on the part of the voters.

If the run-up awards to Hollywood’s biggest night are any indication, watch for Brad Pitt (Supporting Actor), Bong Joon-ho (Original Screenplay), Parasite (Best Foreign Picture), Joaquin Phoenix (Best Actor), Renée Zellweger (Best Actress), Laura Dern (Supporting Actress) to accept trophies.

If I have my way, Toy Story 4 will take best animated feature, and one of history’s great songwriting teams, Elton John and Bernie Taupin will win for Best Song for “I’m Gonna Love Me Again” from Rocket Man. The rest I’ll guess along with you on Sunday night – grateful as always for the three-hour time difference that lets us watch them so much earlier in the evening.

Have a terrific weekend and I’ll be back with you Monday.

Just a thought… It’s exciting to think that some of the best moments of our lives haven’t even happened yet. [Author Unknown]

Well, hey there! I’m glad to be with you here today – back where my time zone matches my computer clock, which I purposely didn’t change, and I awaken to the best coffee in the whole world: Rob’s.

He’s almost 100% over a rotten cold which I’ve been lucky and careful not to catch, while he tells me that Molly wandered around the house for the first few days that I was gone, wondering where the woman who does the crazy voices had gone. Well, she’s baaaack.

While I was away, of course, there were plenty of great adventures – from playing with Colin and getting to know our new granddaughter a little better – to the Facebook Live event Thursday night. It went really well (I’m told) and it was a thrill to take on another challenge and have it work out. Phew!

But there was something else exciting that happened last week – two things, actually – that I want to share with you today.

You may have seen this when I shared it on Instagram @erindawndavis, on Twitter @erindavis or even when afternoon host Darren Osborne so kindly shared the news on CHFI’s Facebook page, but this is happening in May. I didn’t tell you here in my journal, as I didn’t quite know how to; I felt that I needed the word to get out elsewhere before I came on here to share the news.

But many journal readers have been here since Day One in 2003, and it’s you that I have to thank. I’ll be compiling a list of people to whom I’m grateful for making this happen, but honestly, it’s you – the person who’s been with me through the ups and downs and all of those mornings – to whom I owe the greatest gratitude. Here’s how Broadcast Dialogue officially broke the news to the industry I so love, and which has been so good to my family and me.

To be honest with you, I really haven’t processed all of this, but have been touched beyond words by the kindness of people who’ve heard of May’s induction and sent well wishes. We’ll turn the trip into another Ottawa visit, an added bonus for sure!

I disclosed the news about the coming induction as I sat down for 90 minutes to talk with Mike Boon, known as @TorontoMike on Twitter, for a podcast episode on Wednesday. As TV Ontario’s Steve Paikin tweeted @spaikin: “Probably the most extraordinary interview he’s done on his podcast series: a must-listen conversation with @erindavis on the huge highs & agonizing lows of her life.”

If you choose to give it a listen, here’s the link. And thank you, Mike, not only for inviting me to return for your 577th podcast, but for coming to the airport to pick me up and bringing me to your home studio! That’s some kind of service.

So as we settle back into the second half of our time down here in California, I’m taking a few breaths and thanking you. Now that we’re into month two of 2020, I’m feeling a lot more hope and optimism about what the year is going to hold. The irons in the fire are starting to glow just a little bit more warmly and I can’t wait to see what’s coming…while also trying hard to stay patient and present. And always, always, grateful.

I’ll be back here on Thursday.

Just a thought… In every conceivable manner, the family is a link to our past, bridge to our future. [Alex Haley]

First off, a bit of business: if you can or if this is of any interest to you, please do join me tonight as I talk with Yvonne from Home Equity Bank about reverse mortgages. It’s something Rob and I are considering: freeing up equity to have cash on hand for our own personal use. It’s not for everyone, but as I like to say, it could be perfect for us. And maybe you.

So join me at 8 pm ET tonight through my Facebook page and wish me luck! It’s a first – and those always cause butterflies.

I hope that you caught yesterday’s “Let’s Talk” journal. A nationwide effort helmed by Bell Media, it’s a chance for people to raise an often quivering hand to say “me too” or “I need help.” If you missed that journal (in which I focused on addiction) – please check it out HERE.

I said goodbye to our sweet Ottawa family yesterday: Phil took me to the airport for my 11 am flight to Toronto and it reminded me of the old Rodney Dangerfield joke that goes something like, “I went on a pleasure trip yesterday – I took my wife to the airport.” Of course, mothers-in-law are usually the target of those jokes, and maybe his was, but luckily I don’t think that’s the case with Phil.

His wife Brooke, whom we call our daughter-in-law, is settling in with baby Jane, who today turns four months old. She’s gorgeous and sweet, happy and pretty chill. Colin just adores her: he will lean over if she’s fussing in the car and say “Hey, sweet girl,” and put her soother back in. Or he just hangs over her bassinet and smiles at her until she smiles back, which is often.

Coming to help out even a little bit felt like the right thing to do, just doing whatever needed to be done, taking my cues or jumping in. There were long talks in the evening, plenty of baby and grandson giggles, and memories that I’ve caught on photo and video that I’ll cherish forever.

I don’t share those here at their parents’ request; I respect their choice to live their lives out of the public eye like most people do. Yes, our family was different and I loved the connection that helped to make with listeners who were able to feel they knew our family. Being a part of yours, and you being part of mine, always meant a lot to Rob and me. And look how it’s all worked out: all these years later, here we are together, you and I.

So here I am back in the city that gave me so much, just for one more night. Tomorrow, I’ll hop on a plane in the morning and be home by 11 am to Rob, who was busy with various chores he found around the house, until he was felled by a rotten cold. (I made sure to stock up on Cold FX before heading back to the US; they don’t sell it there and we are believers in it. After all, I haven’t had a cold in well over a year, despite all of our flights and changes in climate.)

Of course, travelers today are worried about much more than the common cold and I’ll expect to see plenty of masks on the 5-hour flight back to Palm Springs tomorrow. My three sisters are investing in medical-grade masks for their trip to see us next month; one lives with a disease that compromises her immune system, another works with the sick and elderly (thus access to higher grade masks).

Memories of the SARS outbreak in the 2000s are fresh in everyone’s minds and they’re doing what they feel is right. In fact, USA Today published an interesting perspective just last week.

Me? I’ll endeavour to sanitize everything on the plane that I touch, wash my hands with more frequency than I already do and exercise caution, all the while hoping – but not obsessing – that others around me do the same. Very little makes me anxious anymore, except perhaps my lack of technical knowledge that could get in the way of a good performance (see that first paragraph). But we’ll be good because we have to.

Take care of yourself and I hope you’ll tune in tonight at 8 pm ET for our first Facebook Live chat. And wish me luck. I don’t have my tech guy with me (the aforementioned Rob) but I’m in very good hands.

Stay well. Have a good weekend and we’ll talk to you Monday.

Just a thought… Sometimes the only answer people are looking for when they ask for help is that they won’t have to face the problem alone. [Mark Amend]

By now you probably know that today is Bell Let’s Talk Day. This is its tenth year and I’d love to hope that it helps people like you – like me – to tell our stories to let others know they truly are not alone. And perhaps to add a little perspective.

First, Grief.

The death last Sunday of nine people on that ill-fated helicopter in Calabasas, California brought many people to tears. Others asked how it is that we can mourn someone we didn’t know, and I gave that some thought.

Having a perspective that allows me to know the kindness of many who have shared in our sorrow, I’m able to come up with some insight that I’d like to share now.

I believe it’s because we are able to search our hearts and find empathy for those who knew and loved them dearly, and who are left to try to put back together the pieces of their own shattered hearts. On a slightly different note, I think that when a celebrity dies, we grieve for the joy that knowing them just a little through their work gave us.

A movie star who dies at 88 and perhaps hadn’t made a film or given us any of themselves in their work in decades can still be mourned for the memories of the pleasure their work provided, or even for the moments in our lives that are so strongly entwined with that work.

I’ll use the example of the deep sadness that we felt when Robin Williams took his life. So much of his talent had brought us boisterous laughter and silent tears. We mourned for that loss and the knowledge that he’d never again give us those gifts.

When a singer, whose music made us hold each other closer, dance with more joy or feel that they’d written or interpreted a song that echoed our own sentiments, is gone, we grieve for the sweetness of the feelings their songs brought; what that music meant personally to us. It’s all right to feel sad about the death of people you didn’t know, for – through their work – they let us feel we did.

Addiction

I’ve been amazed by the outpouring of honesty that has come my way in the wake of my talking about going into recovery last summer and dealing with the fact that I had no control over my drinking. One day there may be a book in me about it (no personal details about anyone else, of course) but I haven’t quite figured that out yet. I’m told that book sellers don’t want a follow-up to a memoir; people who see the book might say, “I’ve already read her story…” even though there’s so much more to tell.

All I know is that a whole LOT of people are suffering in silence, afraid to admit they have a problem with substance abuse or habits that are out of hand, and are looking for the strength to raise a hand and say, “Help me.”

I’m doing what I can, in just offering a hand when people reach out. I don’t offer advice, so much as support (although, yes, I can tell people what worked for me). Many say they’ll try and it’s not up to me to prod or push or convince them to take a path to wellness. All I know is that every single person has a different “basement” – some end up penniless or losing their families because they just couldn’t stop; others continue to work, have successful careers and outwardly “perfect” lives and then crumble when some of the support beams are either compromised or taken away.

It doesn’t make us weak; it makes us human. The only thing we can do to get better is to seek help. Yes, a few can quit doing what’s hurting them and those around them on their own successfully; after 10 years’ sobriety I thought I was one of those people. Then two of those supports – our daughter and my job – were suddenly gone from my life (the latter at my choice) and the roof caved in. There were no more duties and obligations, no more self-imposed rules or boundaries.

And so, after a time, I realized that I had to find a way to take charge by letting go, firing myself as CEO of my life and learning that a power higher than myself was going to have to be given the reins if I was going to survive. And here I am, one day at a time.

It all comes down to making that call. Simply doing the hardest thing, as much of an oxymoron as that is. And here’s another one: it takes great strength to admit you’re in trouble, to be vulnerable. This is the one day of the year in Canada where people actually come forth and talk about their weaknesses. I do it far more often, of course, but only as a way of letting others know that nothing, no one, no life is as it appears. And things can always be better.

I am sharing a list of ways that this day can become even the tiniest catalyst for change in your life. Don’t ever stop trying, no matter how many times you falter or fail. You are worth it – your life is worth living. It may not feel like it every day, but it’s the truth. Help is there for you and it’s not easy to ask. Nothing worthwhile is ever easy. But please try. I’ll be back with you here tomorrow.